People Pleasing

People-pleasing! What People Think of You…

Aaarrrggghhh!!!!

What a noose! A chain that can drag us down! Whether we admit it or not, it affects every one of us.

I have so much fun posting pictures on Facebook and Instagram of things I've done, beautiful scenery I've seen and pictures I've painted. And I get quite a kick out of the positive responses I get. Is there anything wrong with this? No. But like everything in life, there has to be balance. Balance that comes from a life fully submitted to God.

One night a couple of years ago, I posted a picture of three watercolors I had just completed. Three watercolors I wasn't terribly thrilled about. I caught myself checking constantly to see if people liked them. Then someone messaged me and asked if she could buy one. I was over-the-top thrilled that anyone would like it enough to actually want it, much less buy it!

Then it hit me! Throughout the night, whenever I woke up, the first thing on my mind was wondering how many other likes I got. How many other positive comments I got. I realized how discouraging it would be for me to not get all those positive strokes from people. I was looking for and actually longing for human approval.

I don't think there's anything wrong with wanting people to like what you do. To enjoy your photography or artwork or writing or singing or anything you do for that matter. But when their approval becomes more important than God's approval, you need to realize that things have gotten way out of whack. I would never have admitted that man's approval was more important than God's, but when that was what I thought about in the middle of the night, I needed to sit up and take notice. When checking Facebook for the most recent “likes” and comments is what I wanted to do first thing in the morning, then I should have known I had allowed man's approval to trump God's approval.

It was painful to realize this and to admit it. In Galatians 1:10 Paul says, “For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.” Ouch!

What did I do with this new realization? Should I have stopped painting? Taking beautiful pictures? Writing? Should I have stopped sharing them with people? All of the things I mentioned are done primarily for the purpose of displaying or sharing so others can enjoy them and possibly benefit from them. I don't perform musically, but those who do, do so for the enjoyment and betterment of others. Right? What would this world be like without art and photography and writing and music?

In his book, “The Grand Weaver”, Ravi Zacharias says, “Human beings are born creators. They fashion their tools, discover new ways of doing things, find shortcuts, and revel in their new inventions. This genius reflects the very character of God and the capacity imbued by Him to humanity.”

God created us to be creative. We are made in His image. When God created this amazing world He often stopped, looked at what He'd done and declared, “It is good.” What He creates and what He enables us to create is meant to be looked at, heard, experienced and enjoyed. By others. Not by just ourselves. God takes tremendous delight in us looking at, enjoying, experiencing and delighting in what He has created. We, in turn, can take delight in others loving what we create.

Again, what did I do with all of this, knowing that the approval of others had become too important to me? I decided to continue to paint, take pictures, write, but back off from Facebook and Instagram for a period of time; a partial fast from social media for the purpose of discipline and focus.

I long for and I so badly need to be filled with Him! I am so easily distracted by everything around me and I recognize that social media and the approval of man were and are a huge distraction. Then and now, I need to ask God to give me His balance so that when I do creative work that He has enabled me to do and has called me to do, it will always be under His Lordship. Fully submitted in ALL things!

I realize what an ongoing struggle this must be for those who are continually in the public eye; particularly pastors, evangelists, missionaries and teachers of the Word. When they are aware of their struggle for man's approval, do they quit? No! They have to keep doing what God has called them to do, but they must doggedly, day by day, moment by moment, surrender it ALL to HIM!

I backed away from social media for a period so that I could interrupt the negative impact of people-pleasing on my relationship with my Lord. And later, with His help, I re-entered the world of “sharing” my work with others, with my finger on my motivation pulse at all times.

People-pleasing and pride are close cousins, intertwined so tightly it's difficult to do surgery. But the comforting thing is that God knows and sees. And He is the great surgeon!

“The fear of man lays a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is safe.” Proverbs 29:25

“For they loved the glory that comes from man more than the glory that comes from God.” John 12:43

“Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men,” Colossians 3:23

“So, whether you eat or drink, whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.” 1 Corinthians 10:31